#V: I am what you made me (Darth Vader with a twist)
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Continued from HERE // @desireandduty
These past several weeks had passed in a bit of a fog for Padme, mostly due to lack of sleep. In the end, they had decided on Theed’s premiere medical facility as the best place for her to give birth. She was glad of the decision, because her recovery had been slow. As a petite woman, it would have been difficult to birth one baby, but two had been exhausting. Without the help of her parents…. she wasn’t sure she could have managed it. The twins were good children, but they were still newborns, which meant they were demanding of time, energy, attention.
If she hadn’t felt like there was a shadowy threat hanging over their heads, Padme would have remained in her parents’ home for months longer. But if Anakin was right and the Emperor did harbor malevolent intent towards her or the twins.. she couldn’t bring that sort of risk down on her parents. So she’d returned to Coruscant only a few days ago, where she at least had the benefit of her handmaidens to help care for the twins. Another pair of arms was needed, because their father had been distancing himself from them ever since they were born. Padme wasn’t stupid. She’d noticed that he came to Naboo less and less frequently. And here it had been three days since she had moved back with only a few buildings as the distance between them, and he had yet to visit.
Or at least he hadn’t until that the early evening, when she’d finally got the twins back to sleep again after their afternoon feeding. She had been shocked and delighted to see him, but there was an undercurrent of hurt there as well. She didn’t understand why he felt the need to keep his distance. He’d yet to come anywhere close to his actions on Mustafar. The more time that passed, the more the incident faded into the past for her. She missed him dreadfully, and the fact that there was no more war or self-imposed secrecy to keep them apart made his absence sting even more painfully.
And now, he'd barely arrived, and he was already up and declaring he ought to leave again. Padme was a proud woman, but she was getting desperate at this point. "Please, stay," she begged, stepping closer and placing both palms on his chest in a pleading gesture. "You only just got here, and I- I miss you so much. I need you. I thought with the war over and us not keeping this a secret that things would be different, but they're not... I don't understand what is keeping you away from us so often."
Life in the new Empire was complicated. It was different than the Republic, although he was glad the Republic was gone. Did he long to be able to live like he was actually married to Padme, once and for all? Of course, he did. But, it wasn’t that simple for him. The Imperial Palace was coming together. It was becoming more like a palace and less like the old Jedi Temple. He didn’t come around that often.
He was still going through changes. He was still trying to adjust to being a Sith, being trained in the ways of the Sith, adjusting his fighting style. The night before, he’d gotten back from finally assembling his new lightsaber, after bleeding a kyber crystal of a dead Jedi. But tonight, he had come by, needing to check on her and the babies.
He had so many concerns. While the emperor knew he was married to her and that she was pregnant, he still feared that he would try to take their babies. He feared her lack of fear of him. She didn’t understand how much more powerful the dark side was, and the fact that what he had done to her, didn’t make her pause at all it seemed, he had to be the rational one. He had to give it time.
While going through all the training he was, he was dangerous. Life was not normal, and it would not be normal again.
“It’s because you refuse to understand how things are. You don’t see the difference in the dark side and what it does. I nearly choked the life out of you and it doesn’t scare you. It scares me, and as long as you don’t see the severity of it, we have to keep a distance. I am here for you and for them, but your recklessness when it comes to me, could get them and you killed. Love can’t always save you. This isn’t something you can just decide is okay.”
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In Born a Sith, how would Vader react if another Vampire (not Palpatine) tried to hurt/ kill/ kidnap/ harm Luke?
Vader sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. The Archives were useless. He had hoped to find something, anything, that might help him with Luke. But there was nothing about Sith children. There were pages full of how a Sith should wait until a prospective apprentice is older before they took the vow and were turned. But nothing about if a child was turn. He found it hard to believe it had never happened before.
He carried his books back to the front desk.
“No luck?”
Vader only glared at Jocasta Nu. She had been a Jedi, a holy knight and sworn enemy of the Sith. She should be dead like the rest of her filth, but she had turned traitor before Vader had slaughtered the knights. So she was not at the temple during the massacre. She had been spared and turned. He hadn’t bothered to remember her Sith name.
“I have a theory,” she said smoothly. “That perhaps changing a child is too dangerous and ends in death. Your son survived because his change was started in the womb. He was born already half Sith.”
Vader gave her a curt nod and was about to leave, but she spoke up again.
“I am not one for gossip, Lord Vader,” she said. “But I saw Darth Liveed flying out towards your palace at the noon bell—“
He didn’t wait to hear what else she had to say. He was storming out of the Archives. It was nothing. A coincidence. Liveed was merely flying that direction … There was nothing else in that direction. Vader’s palace was on the other side of the mountains from Coruscant. It sat next to the mouth of the Metellos River where it met the sea. The Empire’s main military and naval base was located there which Vader oversaw and commanded. And Liveed was not a Sith under Vader’s command. He was not associated with the military. So why was he …
Devastator wasn’t rules when Vader arrived at the dragon barn. Vader strokes her about to soothe her while the attendants saddled her up. She could sense his anger and irritation. She was ready to fight. When the attendants were done, Vader climbed on and they took off. Vader did not need to give any command to make haste to his palace. Devastator already knew.
— — — —
Luke sat at his small desk in his father’s study. Father was currently away at the capital but should return before night. Perhaps if Luke made good progress, he could ask if Father would take him to see the dragons. It had been some time since Luke had seen the dragons. It was one of his few joys he found here.
He heard the sound of heavy boots marching down the hallway. Luke perked up to look like he was deep in thought, but he wasn’t actually reading the words in his book. A chill ran up his back and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. There was a tightness in his chest. Why was he feeling this?
The steps were approaching, and that was when Luke realized the steps weren’t . . . right. He knew the sound of his father’s boots. These steps were too close together. Not heavy enough. Luke turned in his seat just in time to see a figure enter the study. It was not his father.
It was a man. He was tall and lean with black hair and odd dull tan skin. He wore black leather tunics that were layered across his chest in a V-shape. A silver sword hilt with no blade hung on his belt. A crooked smile grew slowly on his lips as he looked at Luke.
“Well, well. Here is the little Vader brat. I was expecting something more, but I see now. You’re just a small scrawny rat,” the man said.
Luke slowly stood up. The man walked to the room, or it was more like he slinked into the room like a predator. Golden eyes flickered in the candlelight. His smile showed off two pointed fangs. He was a Sith. He had never met another Sith before.
The Sith stopped a small distance from Luke. Luke pressed himself against his desk. The wooden edge digging into his back. The Sith was still smiling as he loomed over the boy. Then quick as a viper, his hand snatched out and grabbed Luke’s chin. His cold fingers dug into the skin. It hurt, and so Luke tried to pull away. The fingers dug deeper into his skin.
“Look at me,” the Sith hissed. Luke did. The black in the eyes were like slits. “You . . . You are the prince? Third in line to the throne? You?” The fingers were digging in deeper. Luke could feel his skin being sliced open. The smell of blood instantly filled the air. “How pathetic,” he spat.
His hand ripped away and Luke’s hand jerked to the side. Luke whimpered and brought a hand up to his face and gently pressed his fingers against the new weeping wounds. His fingers were wet with his blood.
The Sith let out a sharp laugh that sounded like a bark. “It is a shame the others didn’t join me. They would have loved to see this . . . THIS child! Maybe I should take you back to the capital? Hmmm? You’ve never seen the throne you have a claim to? Shall we go see it?”
Luke tried to move away, but the Sith grabbed his arm. Luke yelped as the grip tightened.
“I will enjoy throwing you at the feet of our Emperor and watch as his face contorts into sweet disappointment. No wonder Vader has been hiding you. Now come.”
The Sith pulled Luke out of the room and down the hall. The boy looked around for guards, for a servant, for anyone or anything. But there was no one. The Sith’s grip was iron tight and cold. He recognized the path they were taken. They were going to the dragons. Tears built up in his eyes. He didn’t like this.
The door blew open without the Sith even touching it. He could use the Force. The wind was cold and sharp as they walked onto the balcony. Luke could see the stone bridge that connected the palace to the dragon caves. However, there was a dragon already on the balcony. It was already saddled and let out a screech as they approached. The dragon looked odd. It looked like a TIE dragon, but it a bit smaller and more of a light grey than the ones he was used to seeing. Luke tried to pull away, tried to wiggle free, but like his father, the Sith held tight. They had just reached the dragon when a loud screech filled the air.
A shadow fell over them. There was the flapping of wings. The Sith’s dragon pulled away from them. It’s head reared back and hissing as another, much larger dragon descended upon it. Teeth and claws dug into the smaller dragon. Red blood spilled on the stone tile.
“Liveed!” a voice shouted.
Luke looked up to see a figure descending from the heavens. His father landed with a solid thump, his sword in hand and already the blade was burning red. His teeth were bared and his fangs were long.
“Vader!” the Sith said as he pulled out his own hilt. A red blade hummed out of it. “I came to meet the little prince! Little is an apt description.”
Vader’s eyes lingered on Luke. Then they darted up to Liveed. He growled, “I will you give this one chance. Let my son go.”
Liveed threw Luke aside, and the boy fell to the ground. Vader wasted no time. He charged forward, his blade swinging, and Liveed’s blade met it. The blades hummed and hissed as they struck against it. Luke crawled away towards the palace. He grabbed at the thick door and pulled himself up. He twisted around just in time to see his father pushing his red blade into Liveed’s chest. The other Sith was wide-eyed with terror as the blade went deeper and deeper.
The body slunk to the floor, and Liveed’s blade flickered out. The hilt fell from his hand and clinked against the tile. Vader barely paused as he pulled the blade out and stomped over to Luke. Luke whimpered and squeezed his eyes shut. He could feel his father’s rage. It burned but it was cold. A sharp searing cold that grew closer and closer.
“Luke,” Vader said. His voice the same as always. Deep and booming. “Luke. Look at me.”
Luke curled up in a tight ball. He felt a hand on his back. A hand grabbed his arm. But it wasn’t the tight steel he was used to. It was gentle as Vader pulled Luke to him. Large arms wrapped around him, but Vader’s body was still tense. Still hard.
“It’s ok, Luke,” Vader said softly. “It’s ok.”
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Top 10 Star Wars Movies
There have been few media franchises as popular as Star Wars but how have the movies fared with critics? Here are my 10 best Star Wars Films
#10) Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
Nevertheless, for all its blemishes, the movie pushed the series further into the future and beyond the technological limitations of the time, creating a launchpad into the universe's 'Clone Wars' side which has spun off into its own thing.
#9) Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
I understand why people say The Phantom Menace gets a whole lot wrong. There's Jake Lloyd's unfortunatley annoying performance as Anakin (but still cute); there are multiple alien designs that are vaguely racist caricatures; Jar-Jar Binks exists. Yet, there are also some really great elements to Episode 1 that should not be overlooked.
Regardless of your feelings towards the Gungans, Naboo's verdant rainforests, Atlantean underwater cities, and utopian palaces serve as gorgeous backdrops that expand the Star Wars universe. The podracing scene is a fun take on Ben-Hur's timeless chariot race. And the grand finale lightsaber duel is phenomenal. Darth Maul and his double-bladed lightsaber versus Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan is easily one of the greatest fight scenes in the entire series.
#8) Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker
The last Star Wars movie and one of the more generally divisive, The Rise of Skywalker brought the sequel trilogy to a messy conclusion that satisfied some fans while leaving others wanting.
Despite the typically brilliant work done on effects and design, the movie's celebration of the franchise itself ultimately wasn't enough to enthuse those who felt it was either a step backward from the previous installment or too far gone into a more generic Hollywood formula.
#7) Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
The first spinoff of Disney's reign of Star Wars, Rogue One was, while still not without its own controversies, a much bigger hit at the box office than Solo.
Critics seem to agree that, while more a fun detour in the franchise's history than anything else, its origin story for the events of the original movie is more entertaining than its gloomy aesthetic suggests.
#6) Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens
After the mixed results of the prequel trilogy, both fans and critics were overjoyed with J.J. Abrams' first Star Wars movie.
Essentially a remake of the original movie, The Force Awakens was a light and frothy action spectacle that may come to be viewed in a harsher light over time but nonetheless delivered on what audiences really wanted from the franchise at that moment.
#5) Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith
The most generally well-received entry in the prequel trilogy with both fans and critics alike, Revenge of the Sith brought George Lucas' vision for Star Wars full circle in an ambitious and impactful way. Knowing exactly how most of the main characters end up made the story no less tragic and Lucas' political commentary, whilst heavy-handed, wasn't without its relevance.
#4) Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
The finale of the original trilogy certainly has its faults, as reflected by its position in the critical rankings, but, like Attack of the Clones, it was a fittingly big technological step forward for both the franchise and movies in general.
Even if you're not a fan of the infamous Ewoks, Return of the Jedi delivers a satisfying conclusion to the long-running feud between hero Luke Skywalker and villain Darth Vader, which has only improved over time in the face of future movies undermining its impact.
#3) Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi
As much a remake of Empire Strikes Back as The Force Awakens is to the original movie, Rian Johnson's take on the franchise's core elements also added its fair share of ideas to the mix and that's perhaps part of the reason why there ended up being such a huge divide between one very enthusiastic side made up of critics and fans and one vitriolically hateful side made up of a faction of other fans.
At any rate, the movie sits with the most widely loved entries in the franchise as the debate surrounding it rages on, and, like The Force Awakens again, its evaluation over time will be fascinating to watch.
#2) Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope
The original classic is one of the few movies in existence that truthfully has had all that can be said about it already said.
The movie that would eventually come to be known as A New Hope remains one of cinematic history's biggest landmarks and an essentially perfect adventure story. If you've still never seen it then fans and a vast majority of critics agree that you're missing out on a monumental experience.
#1) Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
It's easy to see why Empire Strikes Back is so often floated as the best movie of the franchise, with its darker and more haunting tone that's emphasized by its striking look. Virtually flawless. This is the Star Wars equivalent of Casablanca. Directed by Irvine Kirshner, produced by Gary Kurtz with a screenplay in part by Lawrence Kasdan (in other words, not George Lucas), this has the best dialogue, the deepest characterisation, the most compelling story and the best individual moments of the lot: the Millennium Falcon flying into the asteroid field, Han being frozen in carbonite, Luke and Darth Vader fighting amid the industrial gloom of the freezing chamber with the iconic line “I am your father!”, Chewbacca roaring at Vader (a big deal). As well as the main plot twist, which need not be repeated here, there is also the sight of Vader kneeling before the previously unseen Emperor (also a big deal). And it has Boba Fett.
Honorable Mentions: Solo: A Star Wars Story and Star Wars: The Clone Wars
Well, that’s it for today’s post, thanks for reading! And don’t forget to tell me your favorite comebacks so far and/or if you like any of these films. May the Force be with you.
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But @allronix, the sole reason why Luke didn't end up killing his father in anger, fear, hate and aggression, because follows Yoda and Obi-Wan's guidance. I wrote about this in detail:
That's the whole point of the Original Trilogy: Luke Skywalker succeeds where Anakin Skywalker failed in the Prequels and by doing so, he saves his father by not falling to the dark side, understanding and following Yoda's teachings.
Your interpretations are generally centering around this theme: “loyalty to and love for impersonal, faceless, cold institutions versus loyalty to and love for flesh and blood people.” And in your reading, the younglings are taken from their families so they will be loyal to and they will love an institution, but not individual people, and the Force, which is defined by you in a way that is consistent with Knights of the Old Republic II but not with the six movies and the Clone Wars tv show. But I can't locate this theme in Star Wars.
Obi-Wan takes baby Luke to Tatooine to his uncle and aunt so he will be safe and hidden from Darth Vader and the Emperor, this is also very clear in Episode III. How this relates to the younglings being taken to the Jedi Temple very young, so they can be trained? And what supports the idea that Obi-Wan did this so Luke won't be loyal to his blood relations and can kill his own father without hesitation? Nor I can see, why Yoda would tell Obi-Wan, "To his family send him" if he wants Luke to have this "Order becomes Mother and Father" mentality and how his family raising him could be the best substitute to it? How this would help the alleged goal, to create a situation where "he has no one to love, nothing to lose, and his loyalty is only to the Force and the Order, then he will be the perfect weapon and tool to accomplish what needs to be accomplished for the good of the galaxy - dead Sith"? Unless we want to ascribe to the notion - but I won’t do that and frankly, I am pretty confident that this is not what you suggest - that there is a kind of loyalty, care, affection, warmth and love that is exclusive to individuals who are related by blood, this is not making sense to me.
Also, in Episode V, there is no sign of Yoda and Obi-Wan trying to instill this kind of mentality into Luke, or trying to bring forth the aforementioned situation. All what Yoda and Obi-Wan are saying is actually "You must finish your training, you're not ready, and you're walking into a trap, this is exactly what they want. You don't know what will happen, no one can foresee that, but it's damn sure that if you go now, without the proper training that you need to be able to defeat Vader and the Emperor, you risk everything your friends fight and suffer for. Everything depends on stopping Vader and the Emperor, so be patient. Think how you can serve them best. And if you honor what they fight for, a galaxy freed from the Empire, then yes, you stay, you train yourself to be able to save the galaxy, even if this might mean sacrificing them, at least for now." And Luke is like: "Yeah, yeah I know but I will go anyway."
And this is the intended narrative. I can't say, where and how it failed to execute Lucas' intention:
"It’s pivotal that Luke doesn’t have patience. He doesn’t want to finish his training. He’s being succumbed by his emotional feelings for his friends rather than the pratical feelings of “I’ve got to get this job done before I can actually save them. I can’t save them, really.” But he sort of takes the easy route, the arrogant route, the emotional but least practical route, which is to say, “I’m just going to go off and do this without thinking too much.” And the result is that he fails and doesn’t do well for Han Solo or himself."- George Lucas
"It’s the motif that needs to be in the picture, but it’s one of those things that just in terms of storytelling was very risky because basically he screws up, and everything turns bad. And it’s because of that decision that Luke made on [Dagobah] to say “I know I’m not ready, but I’m going to go anyway.” - George Lucas
“Luke is making a critical mistake in his life of going after- to try to save his friends when he’s not ready. There’s a lot being taught here about patience and about waiting for the right moment to do whatever you’re going to do.” And “Luke is in the process of going into an extremely dangerous situation out of his compassion— Without the proper training, without the proper thought, without the proper foresight to figure out how he’s gonna get out of it. His impulses are right, but his methodology is wrong.” - George Lucas
I assume - and I apologize in advance if I’m wrong - your reading has its origins in the idea that blood relations and personal relationships are falling under the definition of "attachment", forbidden for a Jedi Knight. But this has simply no basis: there is no real reason to believe that Jedi Knights are against familial bonds and in Clone Wars, we actually see twin sister Jedi Masters. In Legends, there are also many Jedi Knights who are actually related by blood. The idea that emotional component of the blood relationship is something that the Jedi frown upon is also not holding up, as we can clearly see that the parent-child bond is replicated in the bond between the Jedi Master and the Padawan, and whenever a Jedi Knight describes their relationship to their master, they say, they were the closest to or like a parent to them. Even if one resorts to the glossary of modern psychology, we find that “attachment” is not synonymous with love, it’s not the descriptor of parent-child relationships, and it’s clear that Jedi Knights are forming the discriminated, preferential intimate relationships, involving receiving and giving love, affection, comfort, protection called “attachments” in Western psychology.
So, I'm confused, what supports the interpretation you proposed? Where it is evidenced in the source material? And how that interpretation takes compassion versus attachment into account?
As for your fic, I didn't read it, but someday I would love to - It would certainly help me to get more familiar with your perspective on the Force. It seems to me that you shaped your Force into an entity of cosmic horror, which seems to be Knights of the Old Republic cosmology...?
What pisses me off sometimes is that many of the people in this fandom already understand attachment but just choose to not use that understanding for the Jedi.
Like. If you weren’t completely confused by Shuri’s arc in the new Black Panther you understand attachment.
If you understood why elenore let chidi leave in the finale of the good place, you understand attachment.
In fact I can think of like eight super hero movies where attachment (and learning to let go of it) is the KEY conflict.
Attachment is not a hard concept to grasp at all. “Letting go” is NEVER portrayed as a bad thing in media. Like. Never. Especially when it’s about letting go of a loved one who died instead of getting revenge.
When people watch a super hero movie and the super hero starts acting like a villain and a side character goes “you’ve got to let her go” I never find paragraphs on tumblr about how the hero should have kept acting like a villain and that side character was the real bad guy.
It’s just that the Jedi don’t struggle with it. The Jedi already practice attachment. They’re already at peace. And since Anakin has been a Jedi for so long and has given no real indication of struggling (I mean they don’t know about his secret wife), they just tell him to practice attachment and think that’s enough. Bc he should already know.
And when people say they shouldn’t have expected this of Anakin bc he wasn’t raised a Jedi… the Jedi are not the only ones who don’t act on attachment. The first person to explain attachment in the movies is Shimi Skywalker. She lets Anakin go and live a better life bc she is not attached to him. She tells him to not look back. This is the woman who raised Anakin. He was raised in a no-attachment household. He has no excuse. He was always taught about attachment. He knew what he was doing was wrong. He did it anyway.
Anakin was not confused by attachment. And neither is the audience really. There are so many stories about how attachment is bad, Lucas just calls it by its name. People choose not to like the Jedi bc they don’t find them interesting. Which is fine I suppose, but if you don’t like the Jedi bc the sith aesthetic is more your speed, just say that. Stop pretending you don’t understand a very common moral conflict.
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Can you please have Lotor and the paladins watch Into the Spiderverse and/or Star Wars? I'd love to hear his reactions to Earth's theories of multiple dimensions and space travel before it was known to be possible. (As well as the "I am your father" plot twist!)
Movie Time With TSLLotor – Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) Edition
“No.” Lotor’s slit eyes widened as he stared at the screen.His jaw dropped slightly. And then he raised his hand to the holographicinterface to pause Star Wars: EmpireStrikes Back. “No, that is not possible.”
Pidge sat next to him. She pushed her finger against his jawto click his fangs shut. “It totally is.”
Lotor blinked. “Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father?” he askedincredulously. “The hero is the son of the villain?”
“Yeah. Pretty cool, huh?”
The prince’s elfin ears pulled back, his face tight in a mixof delight and validation. “The hero is the sonof the villain. They both use this…same force that flows through all, butyet Skywalker uses it for good.”
“Yeah, cause he’s still the good guy,” Pidge said with ashrug. “Doesn’t matter where he came from.”
To Lotor’s left, one Princess Allura still sat in horror,her hands covering her mouth, her beautiful eyes wide. “Ngh,” she squeaked,still staring at Luke’s missing hand. “Keith, you didn’t tell me there wasgoing to be dismemberment.”
On the floor, one Keith lay on his side, delightedlymunching on popcorn. “It’s not like it shows much. I mean, this was the 1980s. Specialeffects were still kinda bad.”
Allura looked down and lightly nudged Keith with her foot indisapproval. “But I like Luke,” shewhined. “And his own father just cut off his hand—that is so cruel andterrible.”
“…It’s awesome,” Keith argued.
“It’s terrible,” she retorted right back, her white browsknitting together. “Honestly, Keith, where is your sense of empathy?”
His lips stretched as he turned to stare up at her. “Takinga nap.”
“Obviously.” And then she tossed some popcorn at him, whichhe jerked to the side and caught it with his mouth.
Allura’s elfin ears flicked in interest of his reflexes, andso she did it again, tossing a popcorn kernel at him, which he caught onceagain in his mouth, crunching down on the popcorn in satisfaction. His eyesglinted merrily.
That managed to garner the attention of Kosmo, who ploddedover to sniff Keith’s face. Then he licked the boy’s mouth in interest of thepopcorn salt. Keith sputtered out a noise between a laugh and a gag as heraised up his hand to gently push Kosmo’s muzzle away. The space wolf lickedhis cheek in response, wagging his tail.
Allura giggled at the sight and turned to Lotor.
The man was still puzzling over the movie’s various aspects,murmuring to Pidge in awe and surprise, “—Particularly advanced for a culturehaving traveled off-planet only several decaphoebs before, capturing not onlythe power but also the mundane quality of space travel. It is so very rare forcivilizations not to worship or otherwise present space travel as a means of obtaininggodhood.”
The girl shrugged. “I mean, our rocket that got us to themoon, the Saturn V, was said to be made of parts from the lowest bidder, andeven the astronauts got tired of talking about the moon after a couple ofdecades. As a species, I’d say we get bored pretty easily. The new wears offfast, you know?”
Lotor raised his hand to point at her. “That is preciselywhat I mean. Contextualization of advancement. Most early civilizations likeyour own would worship space travel in a spiritual sense, and yet even yourlanguage about real events—like your Saturn V and first trip to Earth’s moon—delegatessuch to the realm of the everyday. The exponential learning curve of humans,and your emotional response as a species, is quite fascinating.”
“You saying we’re freaks or something?”
“Just…strangely aware. Even the concept of the Force is surprisingto me. It is rudimentary in description,” Lotor continued, brows knitted togetherin thoughtfulness, “but particularly reminiscent of quintessence—down to itsability to be manipulated by people of all moral alignments. Tell me, does this…StarWars represent humanity’s reigning philosophy of the essence of life?”
Pidge pushed up her glasses in pride. “Actually, the ideabehind the Force is very old. Even early humans believed there was somethingthat tied all living beings together. The names for it changed—ancient humanscalled it the fifth element. Medieval scholars even called it quintessence fora time.”
Lotor’s head tilted in interest. “And what do humans call itnow?”
“Our most equivalent theory would be dark matter—but westill can’t really do anything with it like you or Allura can.”
The prince looked down at his own fingers and allowed themto spark to life with a slight glow of purple. “Dark matter seems to suggest apeculiar obscurity, but it is quite visible to me.”
Pidge dared to grab onto one of his hands, inspecting theglow his fingertips with a scientific curiosity. “They say dark matter is acollection of stars that haven’t ignited or they’ve already exploded, leaving pocketsof energy across the universe. Somehow, you and Allura tap into that unignitedenergy and manifest it for yourself.” Her thin brows furrowed. “But the energyisn’t hot like a star, and I’m not sure how you…channel it.”
Lotor’s voice lifted in delight of a lecture, his eyesbright and face glowing with the awe of human entertainment, which allowed forsons of villains to be heroes. “It is all a matter of being attuned tosurrounding frequencies. But your movie would suggest that quintessencemanifests itself on a spectrum aligned to some moral perception. Blue for good.Red for evil. In truth, the color depends on the frequency or concentration ofthe energy.” He turned to Allura, who was watching them with great curiosity. “Princess,can you help me demonstrate this?”
“Of course,” she murmured happily. She snapped her fingers,and within her palm manifested a glowing light, the same color as Lotor’s. “Purpleis of a high concentration and frequency—only trained alchemists or those withinnate ability can manifest such. There is no moral alignment for it, although Galran-minedquintessence takes on this spectrum per the attempts to gatherless-concentrated quintessence into something more.” Her hand turned, and theglow suddenly turned red. “This color, as I’m sure you know, Pidge, has a lower,more enduring frequency and so is found most readily in planets.” Then Allura’s hand twitched as she narrowed her eyes. The color of her fingertipsbegan to glow blue. “This is of a similar frequency. And the highest frequencyappears as pure black, which is the totality of all quintessence spectrumsabsorbed within the power itself.” Her full lips twitched in a sad way as theglow died about her fingertips. “But I will not show you here, for I do notwish to draw attention from those who would sense its power.”
Her words were a thinly veiled reference to the witch Haggar.
Her eyes flickered to Lotor’s, and he searched her.
Pidge cut between them. “Wait, wait,” she said, narrowingher eyes. “Pure quintessence is black?” Her lips stretched. “As in, dark matter?”
Lotor did not look away from Allura, his voice distant evenas he managed a twitch of his lips. “Perhaps human theories are not so far fromthe truth, then.” The glow died from his hands as well. “Though I will admit, Ihave never been able to attempt such a concentration.”
“Perhaps one day,” Allura murmured softly, “I could show youhow to achieve manifesting black quintessence.”
The prince smiled at her, his eyes glimmering. “I would lovefor you to show me the darkness, princess.” And then his smile stretchedfarther. “As long as it does not require becoming a Sith lord.”
Keith raised his hand. “Siths are cooler than Jedi, just saying.”
Pidge rolled her eyes. “No way. The Jedi are so much moreawesome. Also, they have green light sabers.”
“And Siths have red,” Keith argued lightly. “Why do you thinkI like them?”
Allura giggled. Then she turned to Lotor and murmured, “I donot believe you will have to become a Sith lord to achieve mastery ofquintessence.”
“Then what must I become, princess?”
“My padawan,” she giggled, reaching up to pat his head.
Lotor’s face-faulted, then huffed in a mix of misery andgreat amusement. Here he was, ten-thousand years old and still an apprentice. “Oneday,” he said, voice straining, “I hope to become your equal.”
The words inspired a bloom of a blush upon Allura’s face asher fingers slipped from his hair, which was soft against her skin. “I would verymuch like that.”
He smoothed down his hair where she had displaced it. “And ifyou were to teach me, I would assure you that I would use such knowledge responsiblyas well, even though I am the son of your enemy.” He tilted his chin to the moviescreen. “None of this dark-side domination.”
She lightly grabbed onto his hand and squeezed his largepalm. “You are not your parents, as I am not mine.”
His long, clawed fingers squeeze against her own to reciprocatethe touch. His sharp cheeks flushed in a manner similar to Allura’s—an awe atbeing near a kindred spirit.
“…Hey, can you guys stop flirting,” Keith cut in with a deadpan,“so can we finish the movie?”
#Movie Time with TSL Lotor#The Second Law#Lotor#Lotura#Allura#Keith#Pidge#ahh omg science invaded#as did history#i really enjoyed this prompt#I wonder if Lotor would like Star Wars or Star Trek better#Just imagine this bab outlining the merits of both and puzzling over which he likes more#my writings
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Hello! I was wondering if you've seen The Last Jedi and if you have, any opinions on it. Thanks!
I have seen it! Thanks for asking! :) Heads up, in case people missed my first comment on it the day it came out, I don’t have an enthusiastic perspective toward The Last Jedi. I don’t dislike the film, but it also didn’t grip me. It’s “okay”. So for those of you who are looking for an excited buddy to scream with, I am not your person. But if you are looking at having a fun, thoughtful discussion about the pros and the cons of the film, I am happy to do so with you.
In truth, I think one of the things I enjoy most about the new Star Wars trilogy is the discussion coming out of them. I was at a party a few days ago where we all got into such a long, deep, fascinating, and passionate discussion that we had to pass around a key, and whoever held the key could talk, and everyone else had to listen; we all had that many opinions on it, and it was cool to hear. There were many things we agreed with, other things we didn’t, but everyone’s perspective in the conversation was uber cool. I love that. I love to discuss the new SW movies more than watch them!
I can’t go into every thought I have on the movie now, but I’m happy to share some overarching thoughts! Ya’ll are free to ask for more specifics or opinions on certain things with TLJ, of course!
Note: there are spoilers in the commentary below!
Plot in TLJ
Personally for me I felt as though the plot were strangely scaffolded. Maybe I’ll alter my opinion following a second viewing. But what I felt was that the plot was more cartilaginous than something with good backbone. Rather than having sound structure, with clearly defining points, it had a strange flowing, river-like structure that didn’t altogether convince me.
There were also some unnecessarily long parts to the plot. I’ve seen this mentioned two billion and five hundred sixty three point four times already, but I do agree with it: the casino run with Finn and Rose, while having some charm, was unnecessarily long compared to how it needed to be told. Technically story-wise you could have cut about ninety percent of it and lost little of what needed to be overarchingly told.
I also think the drama with Holdo was unnecessarily complicated and tangled. Simple communication could have solved three plot twists. While there is totally feasible reason to withhold information, the writers never demonstrated that reason, thus leaving it all contorted.
Another big plot gap is something people have talked about a lot: Snoke dying without us knowing anything about him. Some of my friends have talked about how this can have a deep philosophical meta meaning, how it illuminates that we as viewers expect villains and villains of a certain vein, and get caught off-guard when it doesn’t happen that way, etc. But personally for me I feel as though it’s shaky writing. Viewers shouldn’t come away with so little satisfaction about a character who was meant to be a contending force; if the viewers leave like that, it means the execution - whatever the intent - was unsuccessful.
So the truth is, Snoke died without us knowing ANYTHING about this character. Where did he come from? What were his motivations? What’s his background, his… anything? He’s just this vague villain bad Sith guy that Kylo has killed and that’s it. Is there more to this villain that we can show without getting into the books and extended universe material? They really should have given us more by this point in time in the story. They can rectify it through Episode XI, but at the moment, it’s shaky plot-writing ground.
Originality of TLJ
One of the big criticisms of TFA (something I constructively criticized myself) was that it rehashed the plot of A New Hope. Lots of people now seem disjointed because TLJ seems so original - or at least, that’s what I’ve heard from many people. TLJ being more original was refreshing for me.
I would say that it is original enough and that is good. Nevertheless, it’s still not as out-in-the-blue as I’ve seen some other companions of mine claim. In both TLJ and Empire, we have: 1). A rebel base being cornered; rebels having to fight; rebels having to flee, 2). A powerful, Force-sensitive young individual seeking out a Jedi recluse for training and assistance, 3). That Force-sensitive individual receiving some training after resistance, but ultimately making choices the Master finds questionable, 4). Characters being chased by ship by their enemies while the good guys’ ship(s) are in poor quality and need repairs, fuel, etc., 5). The characters go to a well-to-do location to find someone to help them in their rebel efforts, but that assistant turns out to be a traitor and turn them in to the Empire/First Order, and…. yeah. There are still lots of parallels to be made between TLJ and Episode V.
Another thing one of my friends pointed out is that many audience members might feel confused because TLJ ends in an analogous point to not The Empire Strikes Back… but Return of the Jedi. For ROTJ is when Luke is tempted to join the Dark Side and Darth Vader kills his master. We see that parallel with Kylo Ren and Snoke and Rey. But if we’ve already had that big plot event from ROTJ in the middle chapter of the new series… what’s next? That could be a reason why many people are thrown off by what was done in Episode VIII.
But personally for me, the ending material in Episode VIII was the best. The three scenes that stand out to me are: 1). The silent moment, 2). Luke being a badass in front of Kylo, and 3). Kylo killing Snoke, Kylo and Rey fighting together, but Kylo stilling holding onto the Dark Side and taking Snoke’s position. Those were all good moments that I quite like.
Oh. And the visuals. I loved the visuals throughout the movie. Very aesthetically well-done film.
Characterization in TLJ
Characters ranged from really well-written to… the writers randomly flapping hands.
Poe and Kylo Ren were great highlights to me. I found them to be very well-written, founded on good motivations and well-established character. I do feel as though Kylo Ren is one of the more complex characters, who has layers of reasons and emotions, so every decision he makes is well-founded with who he is. And every scene with Poe was one that I appreciated.
Rose was good and what they did with her writing-wise works, and technically you don’t need more background or anything with her… but I would have liked more. I have seen some criticisms on Rose and understand the validity of those; I moreof am saying that Rose as a character is written consistently, with fun personality, and with some fun interest. I liked her on screen. Sniffed out the romance plot a while away and don’t think it was necessary-necessary, but don’t mind it either, because of course that happened, like it does with every other movie out there.
Finn’s characterization was… like the last movie… very rough. Poorly defined. Haphazard. Inconsistent. Wild writer hands flapping willy nilly. John Boyega’s good acting covers that up as well as it can, and makes Finn “feel” like a consistent character. But if you actually look at his choices and motivations across the two films, there is very little pattern, rhyme, or reason to it. Finn is a nice character when you don’t analyze him, though, so I wish that they’d done a better job with his personality and personality arc. That character deserves to be written well.
Now. For Luke. I agree with Mark Hamill on this one. Luke’s characterization was given justification and reasoning, and I get what they were trying to do, but… I don’t think it works. One reason it doesn’t work is that Luke has already learned the lessons he was struggling with in TLJ: he was tested by Yoda for the Dark Side and failed, he saw that someone turned to the Dark could be restored, he saw that giving up would never lend good results, and on and on and on. These aren’t just lessons that he’d need to relearn, but things smashed into the core of Luke’s personality and philosophy and core. And Luke’s struggle is very obviously working against a lot of common sense, which Rey delivers in a few sentences, and then Luke starts being turned to being convinced (there is a slow turn for him, but still). And lots of this goes against most of what we know about Luke’s established character, even when we consider how peoples’ personalities and views change over time. Last.. Luke’s internal conflict felt very unrealistic for his age and maturity. That sort of struggle he was going through I’ve seen lots of people in their mid twenties already have a firm grasp and understanding of. I shouldn’t be out-wising Luke Skywalker. I’m twenty-five.
That said, Mark’s acting was altogether fun and compelling to watch. He delivered very well.
Overarching Opinion
Personally I never felt “caught up” in the excitement of the movie - not that there wasn’t action, but I couldn’t get invested enough to worry or be pulled in. There was never a point where I was grumpy or angry at the movie… just didn’t get dragged into the adventure. It’s one of those movies that I came out of feeling it was “okay” but not astounding. I don’t dislike the movie and I’m not in the wave of complainers or haters or anything. It’s just not something that clicked greatly with me. There were some scenes I quite liked, some elements I quite liked, and lots of things that I’ll always love to debate about. It’s just not the movie that was made-made for me.
#long post#non-dragons#SW#TLJ#tlj spoilers#The Last Jedi#Star Wars#analysis#my analysis#ask#ask me#awesome anonymous friend#anonymous
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@bchemianrhapscdy them though
— l.h.z (requested by @saferincages)
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Anakin literally murdered Padme. And he still died a hero, forgiven by his son.
#star wars#you come into my house you dare disrespect my giant dumbass cyborg murderer like this#i'm kidding i can see why#but like at this point it is too early in the game for me to really say anything about kylo ren's possible redemption#we don't even know anything about him! he's the worst kind of vader fanboy#that's literally it.#he COULD change but it doesn't make the things he did go away#it didn't work that way for anakin#i need to add that i do not hold any hatred against kylo ren's fans#i just don't like him v much at this point#it could change! maybe! if we have more information.#but we have nothing so far so.
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New from Kevin Wozniak on Kevflix: Best of the 2010s: Best Movie Moments/Scenes
Every year since Kevflix has been alive, I’ve made a list of my favorite scenes/movie moments of that year. This is always my favorite list to make as it allows me to highlight some truly great moments in filmmaking, acting, and story-telling. I couldn’t count down the best movies of the decade without making a best scenes/moments of the decade, so here we are.
When making my list for the best scenes or movie moments of the 2010s, I focused on one key thing for what would make the list: emotion. What scenes brought the most emotion out of me? What was the scene that had me the most excited or the moment that nearly brought tears to my eyes? Which moment defined what cinema was in 2010s and which one changed it forever? After much deliberation, I have come up with these ten scenes/moments. These are the moments that no matter when I watch them, they make me feel like I did the first time I saw them and always bring out some sort of emotion in me.. Here are my picks for the best movie moments/scenes of the 2010s.
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You’ve been warned. But if you haven’t seen these movies by now, you’re missing out on some great cinema.
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10. THE DEATH OF HAN SOLO – STAR WARS: EPISODE VII – THE FORCE AWAKENS
JJ Abrams’ The Force Awakens was a perfect reintroduction to the Star Wars franchise. It introduced new fans to a legendary franchise and brought old fans back to franchise they once loved. But when Han Solo (Harrison Ford) is killed by his son Ben (Adam Driver), a.k.a Kylo Ren, it was Abrams sending a message. This was the start of a change. This was Abrams showing us that the Star Wars we knew was gone and that this was the dawn of a new story and new characters. It was a daring, shocking, powerful scene that still crushes my heart every time I watch it.
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9. “COOL GIRL” – GONE GIRL
“Nick loved a girl I was pretending to be. “Cool girl”. Men always use that, don’t they? As their defining compliment: “She’s a cool girl”.
Most movies will give you the twist at the ending. David Fincher and Gillian Flynn give you twists in the middle of the movie. In this dark mystery thriller about Nick Dunne (Ben Affleck) who’s wife goes missing and he becomes the prime suspect and has a spotlight shined on him in a media circus, Fincher and Flynn throw us for a loop right when we think we know where this movie is going. Rather than find out what happened to the man’s wife at the end of the movie, we find out in the middle and what a twist it is. We see as Nick’s wife Amy (Oscar nominee Rosamund Pike) is cruising down the highway in a beaten up car. From there is a beautiful combination of stellar filmmaking and writing. Flynns’ writing is electric, as Amy gives us a play-by-play of her plan, how’s she’s feeling, and why she’s doing what she’s doing. Fincher’s direction is sensational and works perfectly with Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross’ score and Kirk Baxter’s editing. Gone Girl is one of Fincher’s finest films and this is one Fincher’s finest moments as a director.
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8. “SINGLE-TAKE” BOXING FIGHT – CREED
I didn’t know what to expect going into Ryan Coogler’s Creed. Having loved Coogler’s debut film, Fruitvale Station, and being a big fan of the Rocky franchise, I thought I would enjoy the film. But it was this scene, in which Coogler does a “single-take” boxing fight showing us the first round and part of the second round until Adonis (Michael B. Jordan) wins by knockout, that I knew this movie was on a whole other level. The smooth movement of the camera, the physicality and swagger and Michael B. Jordan, and the building score make this one of the best boxing fights I’ve ever seen on film. Creed was my favorite movie of 2015 and it was Coogler’s directorial touch that elevated its greatness.
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7. “LET IT GO” – FROZEN
I have a niece who is three-years-old who is obsessed with Frozen. Whenever I see her, chances are she will be watching Frozen and singing along to it, most passionately to “Let It Go”, in which she sings and mimics everything Elsa is doing in this scene. This is six years after Frozen came out and it just shows how powerful the movie and its key set-piece are. “Let It Go” is the princess anthem of the millennium. It’s an empowering, catchy song that every little child and their parent knows the words to coupled with some beautiful animation. This is a song and movie that will continue to be popular and loved for years to come.
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6. H.A.L.O JUMP – MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – FALLOUT
If there is one thing we learned about Tom Cruise this decade it is that he is a madman. Though one of our greatest movie stars and a spectacular, awards-caliber actor, Cruise took the 2010’s to show just how insane of a man he is and how far he is willing to push himself, namely in the Mission: Impossible franchise. Cruise climbing The Burj Khalifa in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol almost snagged this spot, but Cruise’s H.A.L.O (High Altitude Low Open) jump in Fallout is an extraordinary stunt and feat of filmmaking. Jumping out of a plane at 30,000 feet and opening his parachute at under 3,000 feet is an insane stunt done by top military men and apparently Tom Cruise. How director Christopher McQuarrie shot the scene by having a cameraman follow Cruise as he falls through the air, giving us a front row view of how crazy this fall is, is nothing short of extraordinary, especially seeing it on IMAX. This was peak stunt work this decade and peak Cruise.
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5. DARTH VADER FINALE – ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY
Rouge One was a first in the Star Wars franchise. This was the first side-story the franchise had ever done. It steered away from the Skywalker story and focused on a new set of characters, plots, and stories. Though Rogue One was about the group of soldiers who retrieved the plans to the Death Star, which would then be used by Rebels in A New Hope, we had no idea what to expect in this film, and while the film was very entertaining and unique from other Star Wars films, nothing could have prepared us for the Darth Vader finale. This is the greatest Darth Vader scene ever (yes, including “I am your father) as it showed Vader at the height of his powers, mowing down puny soldiers with his lightsaber and force powers. This ended Rouge One on a high note that nobody expected.
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4. NO MAN’S LAND – WONDER WOMAN
Patty Jenkins’ Wonder Woman came at just the right time for the DCEU. After Batman v. Superman and Suicide Squad disappointed critics and audiences alike, nobody knew what Warner Bros. and the DCEU were going to do. But Wonder Woman came along and saved it. Up until this scene, we only saw glimpses of what Diana (Gal Gadot) could do. She was still learning this new world she was in and was trying to understand how and why the war was the way it was. This was the first time we saw Wonder Woman. Not Diana, Wonder Woman. The shield wielding, head-banded hero who only wants to do good and save the world. This scene got every emotion in me going. It is inspiring, exciting, beautifully crafted, and awe-inspiring. This is the greatest superhero intro scene ever and it’s not even close. This was the birth of a hero. This was the birth of an icon.
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3. “CARAVAN” FINALE – WHIPLASH
Damien Chazelle’s sophomore film is a war film in the music room. A no-holds-barred look at being pushed to the limit for perfection. This all comes to a head in the film’s finale, where Andrew (Miles Teller) gets embarrassed by his former teacher Fletcher (Oscar winner JK Simmons) on stage at a performance. But rather than leave the concert, Andrew comes back on stage and changes the set and starts to perform “Caravan”. But it’s after the song where Andrew really shines, as he riffs for nearly five-minutes, giving the performance of his life full of blood, sweat, anger, and passion as Andrew shows Fletcher that he is the best. But this finale brings up the big question of how far is too far? Is Andrew giving Fletcher a giant middle finger or has he become the obsessive monster Fletcher was grooming him to be? Highlighted by expert editing and mad-house performances by Teller and Simmons, this is a heart-racing scene and one of the best finales of the decade.
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2. “SHALLOW” – A STAR IS BORN
The performance of “Shallow” in Bradley Cooper’s A Star is Born was the most overwhelming movie experience I had in 2018 and one of the most overwhelming experiences I have ever had in a movie. A scene of pure power, love, and emotions that had my eyes almost in tears. The dizzying, almost dream-like first act of the film comes to a head in this scene, as Jackson (Bradley Cooper) invites Ally (Lady Gaga) up on stage to sing a song they briefly wrote together the night before. Ally owns it, and sings her heart, much like Jackson knew she would. Perfectly shot and edited, with Gaga belting her heart out and Cooper presenting a confidence and swagger while being in a state of bliss as he falls in love with Ally and watches her become a star. The song is Oscar-worthy, but its Cooper’s direction and Gaga’s stunning voice that make “Shallow” an iconic cinematic moment this decade.
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1. “AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!” – AVENGERS: ENDGAME
The 2010’s belonged to comic book movies and cinematic universes and nobody did it better than the Marvel Cinematic Universe. After twenty-three movies (twenty-one released in the 2010’s) the MCU came to an epic finale with Avengers: Endgame and what a finale it was. Everything that was the MCU was on the screen at the final battle of Endgame, a scene that is not only the definition of awesome, but is epic on every scale. When all hope seems lost for Captain America (Chris Evans), Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), and the remaining Avengers and it looks like Thanos’ army will take over the planet, we hear the static of Falcon’s (Anthony Mackie) voice in Captain America’s ear, followed by the appearance of T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman) coming from a Doctor Strange portal. It is then an onslaught of everyone from the MCU appearing on screen, both those who disappeared in the snap from the previous movie and those who survived, all culminating in an attack on Thanos and his army with Captain America commanding, “AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!”. Alan Silvestri’s epic score takes over and we watch as eleven years and over twenty movies come together on the screen at the same time. You can’t help but get emotional watching this. We have grown with the MCU and The Avengers and all of these characters and seeing them all on screen at the same time fighting for their lives and the galaxy is something we had been waiting for for over a decade. This moment symbolizes so much of what cinema has become while also being the as big as anything that has ever been on the big screen, which is why it is the best movie moment of the decade.
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@bchemianrhapscdy
Vader or Anakin, whoever he was this week, still didn’t always feel like he and Padme were on the same page. Did they have sex sometimes? Okay, they had sex frequently. They had children. But, there still felt like they had a hard time connecting, sometimes. He had to tell her, that there was a good chance, that he felt like, his master, the master he tried to ignore, because while he was technically a Sith, he had walked away from him a while ago, there was a chance that he knew that he had children. He had to find a way to tell her that. He knew that she would not be happy, and that there was a chance, that it would mess up any progress they had made. But, what was he supposed to do?
Was he supposed to not warn her? She had to trust him to keep them all safe? But, he didn’t know if he could get her to trust him, that implicitly. She was supposed to meet him, in the place they always met. When they met up late, it was typically because they both needed to see each other. They were both desperate, for each other. He wanted to be back at home so badly, but he knew that things took time.
This would make it more complex.
When he heard the door, he went to open it and he smiled at her. “You’re late.”
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@exitiosae liked for a Starter and I’m lazy and continued this instead
Things were not fixed, and her stance on what the man did was unfaltered, in fact ... Her concern grew through the years and with the Empire in place, how dangerous it was, but also the part the man she loved played in it ... How could she ever forgive him? And yet, sometimes, all she wanted to do was forget, to snuggle against his side, and act as if everything was alright. As if their whole lives didn't fall apart in the blink of an eye. It wasn't entirely possible though, even less so when she closed her eyes to sleep.
For years, she'd see him in her dreams. Or nightmares would be more appropriate, with the man's madness in his eyes, and how he begged her to understand, to join him. At times, she was even able to feel the pressure around her neck, and she'd wake up, as if gasping for air to fill up her lungs. She had been lucky that it didn't leave any damages in the long run.
And now ... He was there, with her, in this room they once shared, and all she could do was listen before reaching out to him, placing one hand on the man's thigh which she squeezed gently. She was trying to show him some comfort, for him to know that she was there, that she wasn't going anywhere. That whatever he did, they'd get through it. Together. " That's a good sign. It's proof that you feel guilty -- That you're not entirely unredeemable. " She said in a gentle tone. She knew this man changed, a lot, that he'd never be the same again. He made sure to let her know Anakin was gone, times and times again. " All you can do, at this point, is try to do better. But also, to never forget them. Mourn them, because you know that whoever knew them are no longer present, or unaware of their fate. "
There was something about finding out that one’s wife was not dead, had faked her death and that he was very different now, that made it hard for them to pick up the pieces. He wanted desperately to. He still loved her desperately, and hated that he hadn’t looked harder, but his body had been so weak, and he’d been told that she was dead, just like she had been told that he was dead, But, they both knew the other was alive and he longed for her, in every sense of the world. When he slept, which was rare, as his body didn’t let him sleep due to pain, the nightmares came.
He had regrets. It wasn’t that he didn’t. He had nightmares of choking her, of killing those younglings. The adult Jedi, they didn’t matter to him, but her and the younglings, that would forever haunt him. He had been through hell. His body was forever altered, and he had lost so much of it.
He didn’t know what he thought coming to her tonight would do, but he needed to see her. She helped, even if it was hard for them, even if their future was uncertain. “I don’t know what I am, Padme. I’m scars, charred flesh, barely human. I don’t know what the answer it.” He had his rebreather on his neck. It allowed him to breathe, without a full suit, but he still needed it and he was ashamed of it. “Everyone knows of the Jedi Purge. I am sure their parents know. It’s hard to imagine their parents know and trusted and I killed them all. I didn’t understand that then, but as a father, it’s a pain I can’t imagine. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come here. I just, I needed you..I needed to see someone that doesn’t feel like cold death.”
#exitiosae#(Padme)#V: I am what you made me (Darth Vader with a twist)#(starters)#WEll this is emotional
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